The group was encouraged to become very quiet
and invite the horses back in. By picturing an energy field of
color around the horses and then by energetically pulling the
colored air surrounding the horses back towards our group, we
might communicate our message of welcome to the horses. Additionally,
I suggested that instead of having an agenda to pet the horses
we might quietly say “wouldn’t it be nice if those
horses came over to visit us.’ Within minutes all three
horses come back from the field and stood in front of the group.
One by one they dropped their giant heads over the fence and allowed
themselves to be gently stroked.
As we groomed the horses I asked the teens to
think about how they could take care of themselves in the same
way they were caring for the horses. Although most had never been
near a horse, I noticed how natural they all seemed to be around
the horses. I spoke to a good friend about this and she suggested
perhaps the old Vaquero blood is still very much alive in their
Latino bodies. It certainly seemed that way to me.
My favorite photo from the day is of a young
14-year-old boy whose parents are in jail for gang related crimes.
Jessie confessed earlier in the day that he thought horses were
stupid and mean. In the photo taken right before the end of class,
he has both arms wrapped around my horse Sage’s neck. The
smile on his face puts one in my heart every time I look at the
picture.
We all took a hayride at the end of the day,
courtesy of the ranch owner, Gary Thornton. Gary stood next to
the metal tractor seat shifting the gears, letting all who wished
take a turn at the wheel. The kids navigated the big green tractor
across a field of gold stopping once only so everyone could pile
out and pet Feline, Gary’s favorite dairy cow.
The following two stories are from the Horse
Sense for Teens™ public programs. These coaching sessions
describe two teen participants making declarations that centered
on creating different choices to reoccurring and unsatisfying
situations in their lives..
Sage, Angel, Shiloh, Toyota and Guinness are
waiting at the gate as they do so many mornings…although
the grass is in and they are entitled to every luscious mouthful
they can harvest in the 35 acre field below, the ‘Fab Five’
as I call them always seem to know when they are needed to go
to work, and they stand ever patient for their cue.
Today six teenage boys and girls arrive to take
part to challenge themselves to explore in new ways of creating
self-awareness and leadership skills. I begin the morning with
a leadership exercise. Each student chooses a horse they wish
to partner with. They will stand next to their horse partner and
make a declarative statement of the changes they are calling into
their lives.
A thirteen-year-old freckled face beauty named
Carly selects a beautiful sorrel mustang named Sage, and volunteers
to go first. I ask Carly what improvements she’d like to
make in her life. Without hesitation she states that quite often
she feels overlooked and taken for granted by friends. Carly often
experiences overwhelming self-doubt, although she is obviously
very bright and a good student in school. As the rest of the group
watches from the sidelines, I instruct Carly to lead Sage into
the center of the arena. I then ask her to state out loud a declaration
that addresses the issues she wants to change. In a soft, timid
voice she begins to speak. Sage, who is standing quietly at her
right side, suddenly walks directly in front of Carly and stops.
Carly keeps right on talking, seemingly oblivious to what had
just happened.
When she finished speaking I asked her to comment
on Sage’s behavior. She thought for a moment before answering.
“She walked in front of me like I wasn’t ever there.”
she blurted out. “That’s just how I feel with my friends
when I’m talking and they interrupt me, or change the subject
and completely overlook what I’m saying,” she continued.
“That’s a great observation,” I said. ”
Let me ask you something Carly, what did you do when Sage walked
in front of you?” She thought for a moment and then replied,
“Nothing.”
“Carly,” I said softly, “Consider
that Sage is trying to help you by showing you the need to take
responsibility for how you allow yourself to be treated. Sage
is picking up your body language and energy and responding to
it, that’s all. We’ve all heard the old saying, “actions
speak louder than words.” We teach others how to treat us
in our relationships, not only by what we say, but also by what
we do. If someone treats you in a way that you don’t like,
and you do nothing about it, how does that person know that it’s
not okay to continue behaving that way? Can you help Sage learn
how to treat you better by correcting her behavior and making
your declaration again?” I asked. “Remember to feel
your commitment to yourself, and to your intention as you speak.
“ Carly repeats the exercise with renewed self-awareness,
clear eyes, and a voice that is both strong and steadfast. This
time Sage stands stone still at Carly’s side. Carly’s
beautiful freckled face is beaming with pride.
Sage has performed this particular exercise on
many occasions for this exercise and I have never seen her do
what she did with Carly. If I sound surprised, let me assure you
I am not. I learned a long time ago that horses are mirrors to
our energy systems. They are incredibly honest and always in complete
integrity in how they behave and feel. Horses will always tell
the whole story about what we really think or feel because they
are masters at reading our body language. When Carly declared
her intentions the first time, her eyes were fixed on the dirt
floor; her shoulders drooped down and forward her voice barley
audible. Her words were pleading, “see me” while her
body language screamed “ignore me.” When Carly’s
energy was in alignment with her request, Sage cooperated. With
Sage’s help Carly got to see first hand what she was creating
in all her relationships and more importantly what she had the
power to change.
Bill also has a big life lesson in store for
him this morning. I ask Bill to choose a horse. He selects a big
bay thoroughbred horse named Shiloh.
Bill is 18 years old, and works as a manager
at a fast food restaurant. He is much younger than many of those
he supervises. Although he tries to enforce the work rules and
regulations in a fair way, Bill admits that he has a hard time
standing his ground if challenged. “I really want to get
along with everybody, but I also want to do a good job for my
company,” he said. I ask him to lead Shiloh out into the
arena and make his declaration. The minute Bill starts to speak,
Shiloh begins nibbling on his jacket. Next Shiloh pushes into
Bill’s arm with his nose. Like Carly, Bill keeps right on
talking, occasionally telling Shiloh to “quit that,”
while simultaneously petting him on the nose. When Bill finished
the exercise, he gave the group some feedback about his experience.
“Shiloh wasn’t listening at all, even when I told
him to quit biting me,” Bill complained. I agreed, and then
asked, “ Did you notice that you gave Shiloh a mixed message
by asking him to stop a bad behavior while at the same time rewarding
him for it?
Shiloh was looking for clear direction from you.
Leadership requires giving a clear command with your voice and
your actions. Since Shiloh never got that from you, he ignored
you and did what he wanted to do.
Is it possible that because you want to be both
liked and respected at work, this same “mixed message”
is getting sent to your employees?” The answer was obvious…
it was all over Bill’s astonished face.
Unlike the horse, what humans say and then do
is often unconscious, inauthentic, and out of integrity. With
horses as a mirror to this inconsistency, we get to see our distorted
reflection very quickly and very clearly, as was the case with
both Carly and Bill. As such we are gifted with the opportunity
to “right” ourselves, and alter our experiences greatly.
I truly love these moments with my students. I often ask myself
how I got so lucky to facilitate these wonderful opportunities
for growth.
Horse Sense for Teens-at-Risk™ works with
a number of local non-profit agencies during the year. The following
story is an accounting of one of our workshops held on behalf
of the Novato Youth Center in the summer of 2006. We have changed
the name of the participant for confidentiality reasons. Berta
Campos, Director of Youth Activities, submitted the report.
About 30 students participated in a one-day Horse Sense for Teens-at-Risk
Workshop at Horse Medicine Ranch. The program helps adolescents
develop self-confidence, increase their awareness of the larger
world around them and expand their sense of possibility with a
unique blend of action-oriented, equine-guided exercises and reflective,
indigenous practices. There is no riding involved and no prior
experience with horses is necessary. One of the primary objectives
of the program is to give each student participating a variety
of opportunities throughout the day to learn and experience what
it means to be a leader, and to see that leadership comes in many
forms. By observing the interaction of a herd, participants begin
to discern and reflect on the role of a leader in providing for
the group, as well as the importance and unique value of each
member of the group for the safety of the whole.
Following the art session, participants individually
present and describe to the rest of the group both their art piece
and the imaginal journey that led to its creation. For many of
the participants, this is the first time they have ever been asked
to express themselves before a group in this way or been acknowledged
by others for their creativity. In the individual work with a
horse in the round pen, each participant has the experience of
getting a 1,300-pound animal to follow him/her lead based completely
on the trust and confidence he/she has in him/herself. This is,
without a doubt, an incredibly powerful experience of leadership
at a direct, visceral level. At the same time, the other members
of the group are invited to comment on what they observe, providing
an opportunity to learn/practice leadership skills as a peer guide/mentor.
This is the story that Alyssa Aubrey, Certified
Equine Educator and facilitator of the workshops told us regarding
Adam, one of the students participating in the program. The story
illustrates how struggling students can benefit from this type
of outdoor activities:
The revelations about Adam’s grades came
about with the obstacle exercise. We were working with energy
this morning, attending to our body language, intention and intuition.
By letting go of a rigid agenda to “run up and pet the horse”,
we could observe moving toward the horses with a centered, authentic
presence in our body. The alignment of mind/ body/ spirit conveys
a sense of trust to the horse. In these golden moments, anything
is possible.
Adam looked like he was having a hard time with
the concept. I walked over and whispered, “Which horse has
captured your attention, Adam?” He pointed to Sedona, an
18-year-old Arabian mare. Sedona was standing about 20 feet away
and suddenly pricked her ears forward as if she’d heard
her name spoken.
“I want to pet her, but I’m afraid
she won’t like me,” said Adam. “Why don’t
you walk over to Sedona, tell her how you are feeling and see
what happens,” I offered.
I watched Adam make his way very slowly towards
the beautiful bay horse. He stopped in front of her and looked
up at her face. Sedona lowered her head to meet his. Adam wrapped
both arms around her neck and buried his head in her mane. Instantly,
as if returning the gesture Sedona wrapped her neck around Adam’s
body and held him softly in the fold of her neck.
For a moment the two were captured in a beautiful
mare foal pose. A mare will wrap her newborn foal in the same
way Sedona cradled Adam. The horse will often mirror the mare
foul pose when the horse senses some deep hurt or disappointment
in the human heart.
Horses have an amazing gift for revealing issues
that humans are facing in other areas of their lives. Since it
isn’t the human delivering the information, it is often
easier for the participant to reflect upon these revelations.
The horses “feedback” is so singular and to the point,
that often participants experience profound transformations in
how they view themselves and others.
At the end of this experience Adam shared with
the group that he had been suspended at school and that his academic
performance had a lot to be desired. He also told us that after
this fun and emotional day he would try to improve his grades
and his attitude towards school.
